A Shotgun Surgery
Okay, go ahead and say it. What a doofus! Whatever possessed him to try to shoot his wart off with a Beretta?
It is easy for us to look at other’s folly and render a quick and decisive judgment but what about my foolishness or yours? How long would it take to dredge up that idiotic thing you or I did five years ago, five months ago or even five minutes ago (God forbid!)?
I digress; let’s get back to the story. A British security guard named Sean Murphy, 38 yrs. old, states that he tried everything to get rid of a bothersome wart. He tried ointments and creams. He visited his physician. Nothing, it seemed, would work.
You ever feel like that? No matter what you did, that malady, that irritation, that bothersome entity just wouldn’t go away. One can certainly understand the man’s frustration.
Sean found a shotgun under a hedge, he claimed. A 12-guage Beretta shotgun seemed to be the magic cure. Just aim, fire and boom! Wart be gone! Unfortunately, for Sean, he was unaware of the lack of a precision instrument he chose to do elective surgery with. The shotgun took most of his finger off as well. Apparently, warts on that finger will never surface again. That’s the good news. The bad news gets worse.
Guess what was reported stolen in a 2009 robbery? You are too smart! That’s right, the unlicensed surgeon-patient’s apparatus of choice. Oh, boy!
Fortunately, for the 9 digit, wartless dude, he got a suspended sentence of 16 weeks in prison. Oh, and 100 hours of community service made more challenging by the missing finger, I would bet. He would also have to pay 100 pounds in fees.
You want to hear what the Duke of Doctory had to say about this whole mess?
"I'm happy with that," he told reporters. "I know I could have gone to jail for up to 15 years for a firearms offense. My solicitor did a very good job. The best thing is that the wart has gone. It was giving me lot of trouble."
Go ahead and laugh. I know I did and shook my head a bit. However, each one of us has done stupid things in our lives. Maybe we didn’t lose a finger in the process but perhaps we lost something more precious, like a relationship.
I hope that this post has given you something to think about besides warts, fingers and shotguns.
Find this story at: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/43418116/ns/world_news-weird_news/
It is easy for us to look at other’s folly and render a quick and decisive judgment but what about my foolishness or yours? How long would it take to dredge up that idiotic thing you or I did five years ago, five months ago or even five minutes ago (God forbid!)?
I digress; let’s get back to the story. A British security guard named Sean Murphy, 38 yrs. old, states that he tried everything to get rid of a bothersome wart. He tried ointments and creams. He visited his physician. Nothing, it seemed, would work.
You ever feel like that? No matter what you did, that malady, that irritation, that bothersome entity just wouldn’t go away. One can certainly understand the man’s frustration.
Sean found a shotgun under a hedge, he claimed. A 12-guage Beretta shotgun seemed to be the magic cure. Just aim, fire and boom! Wart be gone! Unfortunately, for Sean, he was unaware of the lack of a precision instrument he chose to do elective surgery with. The shotgun took most of his finger off as well. Apparently, warts on that finger will never surface again. That’s the good news. The bad news gets worse.
Guess what was reported stolen in a 2009 robbery? You are too smart! That’s right, the unlicensed surgeon-patient’s apparatus of choice. Oh, boy!
Fortunately, for the 9 digit, wartless dude, he got a suspended sentence of 16 weeks in prison. Oh, and 100 hours of community service made more challenging by the missing finger, I would bet. He would also have to pay 100 pounds in fees.
You want to hear what the Duke of Doctory had to say about this whole mess?
"I'm happy with that," he told reporters. "I know I could have gone to jail for up to 15 years for a firearms offense. My solicitor did a very good job. The best thing is that the wart has gone. It was giving me lot of trouble."
Go ahead and laugh. I know I did and shook my head a bit. However, each one of us has done stupid things in our lives. Maybe we didn’t lose a finger in the process but perhaps we lost something more precious, like a relationship.
I hope that this post has given you something to think about besides warts, fingers and shotguns.
Find this story at: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/43418116/ns/world_news-weird_news/
Good thing the wart wasn't on his nose.....
ReplyDeleteWow. Actually, I can relate in some ways. Having a cough for the last 3 weeks has caused me to think the weirdest of things like I wish I didn't have lungs or I wish my throat could be removed. LOL. It's annoying to wake up every day with a cough. So I can see how a wart would irritate someone. Not sure I'd go from thinking to acting on it, but nonetheless, I think you are right. We've all done dumb stuff.
ReplyDelete